The consequence Jar

The last week or so, I've really been trying to tackle the tattle monsters. If you are my friend on Facebook, you've seen the tattle scores each day and the improvement my kids, specifically Annie, have made. I didn't do much intervention. I simply told them that I was keeping score and it was like golf. The winner will have the lowest score. Congratulations to 13 month old Chloe Beth for winning the tournament!

Anyway, during my cleaning binge, I felt as if I was doing way too much yelling and redirecting. I know that effective parenting doesn't include yelling and less talk is usually more productive. I've seen consequence jars on Super Nanny and Nanny 911 as well as in various parenting books that I've read. I decided to give it a try. I sat my 3 big kids down and had them brainstorm the consequences. Keep in mind that Annie's cleaning adventure was still fresh on the brain. Here is a list of the consequences that they came up with. Luke has a separate list because of his age.

Landon and Annie’s List
5 minutes in time out
10 minutes in time out
Go to room for 10 minutes
Bedtime 10 minutes early
Stand up and touch your toes
Pick out a snack for your brothers and sisters, but you don’t get one.
Pick out a piece of candy for your brothers or sister, but you don’t get one.
No computer time or Wii time for 24 hours.
Clear off the table and wipe it down after every meal.
Clean kitchen floor with toothbrush and non-toxic wood floor cleaner
Clean bathroom floor with toothbrush and non-toxic cleaner
Give your brothers or sisters one of your bedtime animals for the night.
Count your lucky stars, because you got off lucky this time--no consequence.
Do 10 push ups and run 3 laps around the yard
Do 30 jumping jacks
10 minutes of watching an “off” TV


Luke’s List
Pick out a snack for your brother and sisters, but you don’t get one.
Let Annie and Landon have 10 minutes on tractor.
3 minute timeout.
10 minute room time
No Sprout TV at night
Pick out candy for your brother and sisters, but you don’t get any.
No tractor for 24 hours.

No More Play Time

I've said before that my daughter has a terrible time playing. When we make her go play, we are recipients of a crying fit that would make passersby suspect abuse. No kidding! If we want to be REALLY severe, we suggest she go play outside. Talk about cruel and unusual punishment! Well, I was on a cleaning binge the last couple of days. I was quite frustrated because I couldn't seem to make progress. I tried to explain to the kids that I could get things done a lot quicker if they would just go play. Poor Chloe Beth either spent the two day binge in my arms, in the pack&play, in the high chair, or sleeping. Luke managed to get into absolutely everything including acrylic paint, dish soap, and eggs. He even managed to write on my wall with mascara! Landon ceased the opportunity to play unlimited hours of Wii. Annie went all RAD on me. She started every little fight she could, broke all the little nit-picky rules, button pushing rules she could think of. And pretty resisted any encouragement to go play and have fun! (Side note: I also have ADD and am actually pretty proud of this gift. I take medicine that is quite effective, but there is always one week each month that the medicine doesn't seem to make much difference. This was the week!)
So, I finally get a "no, duh" idea. Why don't I just let Annie help me. I bring her too me and explain to her that I am going to be nice. I'm not going to make her play and I'm going to let her follow me around the house and maybe even work. I let her start with a magic eraser and Luke's mascara art. I know that having the artist clean it would be a logical consequence, but not this time. Luke wouldn't be able to do it and Annie actually wanted to. She was so happy about getting to work and not having to play. The wall that she cleaned is pictured above. She used a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser. Funny thing, when she was almost done, the last part of the art revealed a capital A that looked remarkably similar to the way she writes her A. You know, Luke denied the work. That is unusual, he is usually proud of his adventures. That is when I decided that I needed to take some pictures. You can barely see the faint outline of the A on the wall. I guess I will never know who the true artist really is.

I was really searching for things Annie could help me with. I don't want four-year olds dealing with harsh chemicals. I looked around and realized that the bathroom floors really needed attention around the baseboards. I remembered actually enjoying the toothbrush scrub method when I was a kid. I pulled out my own toothbrush, remembering that I have a unopened new one that I got from the dentist this week when he yanked my wisdom tooth, and some Method glass cleaner. It's non-toxic and has a peppermint scent. I even let her spray it herself. Wow! What a treat. She really enjoyed scrubbing and rinsing the toothbrush. When she finished a section, she dried it with a towel. She did a FANTASTIC job and we had some great bonding time, and she even showed concern about my willingness to sacrifice my toothbrush. Go figure!
When we were finished with the two upstairs bathrooms, Annie was ready to take all the supplies to the downstairs restroom. I just cleaned the crazies out of it the day before. I would have let her go for it, but she had to be supervised and quite frankly, I was having some terrible stomach cramps. I needed an Excedrin and a nap.

Brandon and Stephanie Get Married

My husband's cousin got married last weekend. My husband and I are not strangers to weddings. There are not too many times when all four of our children attended a wedding. I'm glad it was outside. Our children were pretty well-behaved, other than Chloe wanting to practice her new mobility skill (walking) every chance she gets.

I want to point out a couple of things in the picture. First, notice the matching outfits. Remember, it is a parenting tool. Every guest at the wedding knew which kids belonged to me. This is a very beneficial trick when you're Luke's mom. Second, do you see what is on the other side of the fence? Yes, it is a race track--Keeneland in Lexington. There were no races going on that day, but there was a big marquee in the infield showing live coverage of the Belmont. Pretty cool. Third, notice Luke's shoes. I just think they're cute.

Well, I don't think you can have an outdoor wedding in the horse capital of the world and not let the kiddos see a horse. Annie, Luke, and Landon are enjoying a carriage ride with their cousin, Chance. Annie was relieved that it wasn't a race horse, but I think Luke was a little disappointed. Landon is such a good big brother and cousin. Can't you see the proud big cousin grin he is sporting as he looks at Chance?

See! I told you he was a proud big brother. I can hardly get this boy to look at a camera, but he wanted his sister to get her picture taken, so he got down on the ground to help her and be a good example. He's only six, but I can already tell that he is going to be an awesome husband and daddy someday.

This is the Best Man and the Maid of Honor from the wedding. They also happen to be the little brother and little sister of the groom. How many weddings can you go to where that happens? They also happen to be my husbands little cousins. I hope that my children are that close when they get older. Lindsay and Seth were a big part of this wedding. I think they might have been glowing almost as much as the bride and groom. They were so happy for their big brother.

And, here my friends, are the bride and groom: Mr. and Mrs. Brandon and Stephanie Lancaster. They are so happy. Do you see in the background the table of gifts? OOPS, the Sweeney Clan left theirs in Bowling Green. I still haven't put it in the mail. I guess that should go on my To Do list for tomorrow. I'm not feeling too bad about it, I know that I loved getting wedding presents in the mail. It's a lot better than the bills they will soon face. Congratulations Brandon and Steph! Your wedding was beautiful!